Ellen hosting the Oscars 
There are two things that can happen tonight:
- Leonardo Dicaprio is going to win the Oscar
- Leonardo Dicaprio is not going to win the Oscar
and both times tumblr will go nuts and I will enjoy every minute of it
"I’ve seen blue skies through the tears in my eyes."
The Rocky Horror Picture Show
A guy is taking his girlfriend to prom. He waits in the ticket line for a really long time but gets them. He goes to rent a limo. The rental line is really long but he eventually does it. He goes to buy her flowers. The line at the florist is really long but eventually he gets the flowers. At prom, she asks him to go get punch. He goes to the refreshment table and there’s no punchline.
you’ve got to be kidding me
I am in physical pain
We accept the reality of the world with which we are presented.
Reblog If You Can Take Off Your Bra Without Taking Your Shirt Off.
“It’s Been An Adventure, Mr. Fredricksen.”
“Adventure Is Out There!”
Someone asked me to post these two companion pieces together so it was easier to reblog them.
THIS WAS NOT OKAY
HE’S STILL WEARING THE ELLIE BADGE
I was just going to scroll past this when I REALISED what it was
Shit I’m crying